Take my wings and fly away

I think it is soon gonna be the time of the month. Because I can sense my emotions getting all wired up and fucked.

I realised I am a girl who needs attention from my the other half. Perhaps it is because I strongly believe that if you really do like someone, you would have the urge to want to contact him/her.

But in my own reality, the guys I met always do not practice this. Is it my problem or theirs? I always ponder.

But then again, perhaps I'm the one being sensitive and possessive probably because I didn't have an official, stable relationship before. That's the reason I am giving myself.

Some relationship will cause 1 party to change for the other. Change is good, change can be bad as well. But I do realized I'm am always the one changing subtly to fit the other party. And I don't feel bad, or uncomfortable. So is that change good?

I tend to love someone wholeheartedly. Wanting to find out more about them, be in their life, and I want them to be reciprocative as well.

I believe in effort. Like the effort you wanna to incorporate someone into your life. So if you are not putting in any effort, then what's the point?

I can solemnly swear that I know I am someone who is loyal to my the other half. And, haha, perhaps I can prove or affirmed that I don't really go for looks or status.

Bastards came in and out of my life. I'm glad they are out because it meant that the lesson is over. Valuable lessons indeed. But due to these lessons, I became afraid. Afraid of being abandon or unwanted again. It really sucks you know to just invest on something and poof! the other party just decided to end the shit whether you like it or not. It is just fucking tiring.

Perhaps this is my last shot. For real.